Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Was Blind But Now I See

One of my main grouses about acute myopia, (short sightedness) is:

1. waking up to pee in the middle of the night, and groping for your glasses... or just heading to the toilet without.

2. cutting hair in barber, esp unfamiliar ones. the minute you take off your glasses, you are at their mercy, and might as well take a catnap until they're done, since I can't see what they're doing ANYWAY.

3. buying a new frame*; cos I can't really see what I look like with the new frames. It's not that I'm vain or anything, in fact, I'm a slob, as far as aesthetic appearance is concerned, ..........hmmm, check that, I'm a slob, period. I burp and fart in public. That reminds me, every time I do squats in body pump, I have this urge to let go a huge loud stinker. It must be that unnatural position. Kinda like Pavlov's bell. Reflex action.

4. entering a steam room; need I say more. The sudden fogginess assails you like an on coming train. And it doesn't help to wipe your glasses in a steam room. In a sauna, it's somewhat better. Initially, the glasses will fog up, but later, it will clear.

5. scuba diving; the transition time in between putting or taking off the powered mask, and groping for your glasses, or groping for somewhere to put them. Often, on a rocky boat, this is quite dizzying.

6. infants & pre toddlers; they have a penchant for ripping off your glasses off your face, with the dexterity of a master pick pocketer. Often, metal frames get twisted out of shape.

7. shades; no, not the blogger. But unless you wear contacts, you need powered shades, which means you can't just pick up any pair of trendy shades to wear at a whim. And since I've got dry eyes, (from all that crying in my youth), contact lenses don't seem to agree with me, and I am NOT going to try the hard lenses.

8. sweat; well, actually, this isnt a major grouse, for over the years, I've become quite accustomed to profusely perspiring, with glasses on, and for most activity that result in perspiration, eg, tennis, squash, body combat, body pump, jogging, sex, the glasses aren't really that much a hindrance. BUT, the one time where it really IS a pain, is at the golf driving range. Sweat used to trickle along the frame, and accumumalate at the bottom rim of the lens, much like a half filled goggle. That is REALLy annoying. To have to take off your glasses to wipe every 2nd stroke is exasperating.

Side Note: Oh, speaking of body pump, it never ceases to amaze me how my NOSE starts to itch on cue, the minute we do our squats, or chest tracks, when its virtually impossible to scratch. I wouldn't dare use one hand to support the weights, to scratch my nose.

9. swimming; much like scuba diving, except, you're likely to meet people you know, at the swimming pool, who might be smiling at you, or waving at you, and you squint, and squint, till your retina nearly pops out. Powered goggles aren't quite as clear on land as they are in the water.

10. 3 D movies; aiyo, its a pain to wear those 3D glasses over your glasses. PAIN.

Anyway, still, we must thank God for His blessings, that at least we are not blind (in sight). Blind heartedness is a different matter altogether. Oh, the asterisk in No 3 was meant to refer to a footnote:

* the illustrious spec shop girl, (well, actually she's one of the owners) helped me out by taking a digital pic of potential new frames to show me what I'd look like.

Note to "Friends of FF GX" - here's another clue for your picture composite.... me with eyes closed.

To the uninitiated, FF GX I think stands for Fatness First Group Exercise.

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